On Being Mixed

  
I was a pretty ambitious 6-year-old. When my Girl Scout troop shared what we wanted to be when we grew up, I proudly said The President of the United States. My parents raised me from day one to believe that I could accomplish anything if I worked hard and never quit. So imagine my surprise when the troop leader, a happy, granola-eating, soccer mom, looked me stonily in the eye and said, “You can’t. You weren’t born here. You’re not really an American.”

Maybe she thought I was only half American, as if only my whiteness counted as citizenry, and my Korean side made me less-than. My mother is a first-generation immigrant, moving to the States soon after I was born. I only ever remember living in the states, and despite being overseas, I was born on American soil, on a U.S. army base.

I don’t really remember how my parents reacted to the Girl Scout incident. I remember being sad and frustrated, and I haven’t thought twice about being the president since. I stayed in the troop. Maybe they knew it was the best way for me to fit in as the new kid at a Catholic school full of perfect blonde Dutch children. And it’s not like I didn’t have fun. I made a few friends and learned how to make ice cream in a bag. That was more important to me at the time than my ambiguous ethnic identity. But I still remember the affect it had on people. As young as I was, I still noticed how my mom was looked over as a parent volunteer because of her thick accent. And as old as I am now, things haven’t changed much.

Why Feminists Apologize

A few days ago, I was reading through some old blog posts and apprehensively revisited the letter. If you’ve been following me for a while or know me personally, you’ll know what I’m talking about.

Last year, when my blog was still a baby, I shared an anonymous friend’s open letter that voiced her frustrations with Greek life as a member of a sorority.  We got over 10,000 views in less than 24 hours, but the excitement wore off pretty quickly. While we both received support from friends and regular readers of my blog, we were also overwhelmed with a large amount of criticism and harassment – online and off, anonymous and not.

Let’s Stop Using “Mental Illness” as a Cop-out

… For murder, violence, and other acts of inhumanity.

It seems that every news coverage and conversation about Dylann Roof and his murder of nine Black people in the Charleston church includes some sort of discussion about his perceived mental instability. But throwing around phrases like “mentally ill” when analyzing certain acts of terror do a disservice to the victims, their families, and the community impacted by this terrorism.

What I’ve learned so far is that it is easier for the media (and potentially the justice system) to label a young White male massacring Black people in their church as mentally ill and “troubled”, stigmatizing all people with mental disorders, than to identify him as a terrorist.

Of course, there are situations where insanity does play a key role in someone’s delusions and then consequential actions. But this is not the norm. If someone with a mental illness is deemed harmful by the medical community and has notable criminal intent, it becomes a societal responsibility to treat and rehabilitate the individual. 

But I cannot emphasize enough that this is rarely the case for any type of mental disorder. (In fact more people commit crimes against people with mental disorders than the other way around.)

People with mental illnesses are still people. Although a lot of psychopathology does rely on genetics and our chemical makeup, murder and cold-blooded acts of violence rarely do.

Racism, prejudice, and violent intent to carry out these thoughts are learned. Despite any history of mental illness, Roof learned his racial hatred and expressed it through an act of terror. 

We shouldn’t default Roof to be a troubled man with a mental disorder. In the context of his massacre, he is first and foremost a terrorist.

I have known, studied, lived with, loved, and been a person with a mental illness. I know that this event is multifaceted, but it disturbs me to see so much focus on mental illness as an explanation for terrorism. 

I am concerned about his state of mind: his white-supremisist ideology that is shared by too many. I am concerned about how we treat racism and how we brush off “casual” discrimination and prejudice until the threats become real and we are forced to deal with actual dead people and their broken communities. And even then, I am concerned with how we deal with that.

xx. Diana

An Open Letter to Frat Boys

Apparently, I am a GDI. A God-Damn Independent, otherwise known as someone not involved in social Greek life. Because I guess despite not being in a sorority, I still need to be characterized by three arbitrary letters.

I never seriously considered joining a sorority. I suppose I was turned off by the general atmosphere of inherent misogyny, internalized sexism, dependence on classism, and perpetuation of unhealthy power dynamics. However, most of my friends are involved in Greek life, and I love and respect them just the same. I’ve learned to see the benefits of Greek life and know that not all sororities or fraternities fit the stereotype as intensely as others.

My good friend who is in one of the most “popular” sororities on campus shared with me a paper to proofread entitled An Open Letter about Feminism in Greek Life that directly addresses frat boys and the ways they communicate with sorority girls. It was incredibly powerful and interesting for me to read about feminism in this context from an insider’s point of view, and I’ve received permission to publish her paper anonymously here! I am sure you will be just as engaged in her paper as I was, and I am excited to see discussion inspired from it.

Here it is below.

Minimalism in the Hipster Movement

I’m taking a great class this semester through the American Culture department at UMich that talks about subcultures in America, fondly nicknamed “Beats, Hippies, Punks.” A lot of what I’ve learned so far is from the “OGs” of the enlightenment movement, one of them being Thoreau. If you’re familiar with him, you’d know that he preached minimalism, individuality, and the denial of mainstream capitalist materialism. You’d also know that he did all of this from Emerson’s backyard.

The hippie movement decades later emphasized the same sort of idea. Minimize what you have and find your heart outside of the capitalist world. Now, this is a really romantic idea, but the majority of the hippies invested money in looking undone and effortless, coming from middle class families and upbringings.

Every week for this class, we submit reflections where we can react to the course material. A lot of us rant about the hypocrisy of “hip” subcultures. Don’t get me wrong – this is a great class. Also, mainstream culture is not any less hypocritical. However, it’s important to criticize and question everything. Most alternative, liberal ideas that point out the flaws of mainstream society have flaws themselves. Sometimes, they aren’t any better.

The rest of this post will be snippets from my last reflection paper that talks about minimalism in current hipster culture. It’s pretty much just me being angry. Understand that this is an outlet to express my opinions, and in reality and typical conversations, I communicate much more moderately. I have many other ideas that are more sympathetic to the minimalist, hipster movement. I just didn’t choose to express them today 😉

Let’s Talk About Periods

I realize fully that a lot of people will decide not to click on this post because of the stigma that surrounds menstruation. However, the refusal to read this because of the expectation that conversations about periods are gross, graphic, or impolite serves as evidence to what I’d like to say about periods. And the perception of female health in general.

This semester, I’ve enrolled in two classes that talk about the psychology of women and gender and women’s health. I firmly believe that feminist ideology is something we should be exposed to in an academic environment to dispel preconceived notions of what a feminist is and who can be a feminist. To clear it up:

Feminism is the study of how gender roles and stereotypes affect and oppress everyone and the advocacy of equity amongst all genders, including intersectionality amongst race, ethnicity, religion, sexual orientations, social class, and other identifiers.

I’ve been reading a lot about not only the biological facts about menstruation, but also how our society affects women’s experiences with their bodies and menstrual cycles. One of my favorite pieces so far is Inga Muscio’s chapter “Blood and Cunts” from her book Cunt: A Declaration of Independence. (Disclaimer: I don’t know if I wholeheartedly agree with some of her ideas about the lunar cycles syncing with menstrual cycles, but it is quite interesting and I encourage people to read it.) A lot of other academic sources reinforce her statements about society’s influence on how young girls and women perceive their periods and genitals.

Constructive Dialogue for Controversial Issues

I like to believe that as I’ve grown older I’ve become more aware of political and social issues that often divide audiences and formulated my own opinions on many of them. A lot of people choose not to talk about these subjects and would rather keep their thoughts more private, which I completely respect. Discussing politics and other issues can become incredibly frustrating, and forums for specific topics can move on to other tangents that include personal attacks. From feminism to racism to welfare programs to Obamacare, I’ve overheard and participated in several debates-turned-arguments that left all parties feeling dissatisfied, annoyed, and bitter. When talking about polarizing topics we can create animosity amongst friends and further isolate one another, preventing opportunities for growth and positive change.

In Response to Race and Ferguson

This is (hopefully) going to be a short one.

I’m not writing about the Michael Brown case. Others have written about it for more eloquently than I ever could, and I know I could not do it justice (irony not intended). In fact, this is most likely the extent of what I will publish on the topic.