Belief Systems

I believe that two months is too long to go without writing something longer than a tweet. The act of writing itself is a relief but sharing it is daunting. It requires commitment beyond 140 characters and sleepy thoughts scribbled illegibly half-past midnight. I believe that writing makes me honest, but to be honest I don’t like what I write.

I believe in a lot of things. Perhaps ironically, not in a black and white way. I prefer to embrace grey areas, question everything, and tiptoe in some purgatory of real or not real. But the things I do believe in, I do so fervently. I believe in dualism of ambiguity and passion. I believe in thinking a lot rather than thinking too hard about what you should be thinking about.

I believe in texting first, second, third, and last. I believe that there are worse things to do than express interest in someone and that there are better things to do than analyze the frequency of virtual correspondence.

I believe in the pursuit of knowledge for the sake of the pursuit. I don’t believe we need answers for everything because there are rarely answers for anything. If we derive the merits of intellectualism from the answers we get, or think we get, we are operating in a limited, subjective manner, trying to understand the unquantifiable, infinite, unnameable is-ness of reality and beyond.

On a somewhat related note, I definitely believe in aliens.

I believe that we operate under some sort of collective consciousness. I believe that we fear different variants of the same things. Rejection, loss, death. Being that tree that falls in the middle of a forest with no one to hear it.

I believe that if someone tells you a song reminds them of you, hold on to them. And listen to that song on repeat. What a wonder it is for music to carry and envelope the people we know. 

I believe that when you love something, you give it the power to hurt you. And then trusting that it doesn’t. But I think it’s more important to love yourself the most because pain is inevitable.

Now, let me tell you what the most important thing is that I believe in. This is my secret to getting through the day without being swallowed whole by the world. I believe that everything is temporary. Snow melts. Tans fade. We make homes out of our habits, but we still wake up some mornings unable to find what we took for granted the night before. Our memories worsen and our imagination fills in the gaps. Happiness, pain, it’s all temporary. Most of all, we are temporary. I believe the things that matter are the things we let matter. What stays in our lives are what we don’t let go of.

I believe in publishing first drafts. Mostly because I can’t bear to read what I write. If you can, thank you.